Tech Olive

Welcome to Day 1 of my 48-hour technology blackout journal taken during the dark time I spent without digital entertainment. Instead of saving the world from the tyranny of zombies, Nazis, aliens and every other flavor of cliched video game adversary, I spent my days reading and eating. Cold showers and time-wasting activities like shopping and cleaning were my only safe haven in this crazy reverse-endurance test.

Day 1: Saturday, June 26th 12:00AM. It Begins.

At the start of this whole debacle, I was feeling a hint of confidence, but more than anything, I was wondering just how painful this experience would be. I’ve powered through many all-nighters and 12-hour gaming marathons with ease, but never have I performed a marathon in reverse fashion, so its effects on my body and mind were a dangerous unknown.

Luckily, I possess a printed copy of the all-important Zombie Survival Guide. Since it had been somewhere around a year since my last read-through of Max Brooks’ priceless undead informational book, I deemed it worthy of a read-through during my 48-hour technology hiatus.

Finally going to bed at 1:24AM, I slept swiftly through the night and awoke at 10:38AM. Rolling my carcass out of bed, I threw on the clothes I could grasp in my cold dead fist and headed down two flights of stairs to the sanctuary of food that many refer to as simply the “kitchen.” After a fine meal of frozen waffles and precooked sausage, I dragged my lifeless body back up two flights of stairs to prepare for this month’s shower.

Because radios were part of the blackout, and thus off-limits, I was forced to endure my ice-cold shower with nothing but the Pirate song stuck in an endless loop in my head.

The remainder of my Saturday was spent eating, reading, cleaning, eating, reading, eating, staring at my cold, dormant PC with eyes like a predator staring at a PC. I’m not sure where I was going with that. Anyway, more food was eaten, more words were read and the day continued on despite a total lack of PC, music, movies, TV or anything else that makes life enjoyable.

Nearing the end of Saturday, I broke out the Legos and enjoyed myself some block-building nostalgia until my fun was interrupted by the invitation to my brother’s house for a kind of dinner party with games and other family (other family not to be eaten, mind you). Reluctantly, I accepted. I assured my Lego construction that I would return to finish what I had started.

After a party filled with pizza, miscellaneous card games, making people laugh (because, of course, I’m hilarious) and eating all manner of colorful, sugar-based and gummy paraphernalia, the party came to an end and home soil was reached with 30 minutes left in the day. So, what did I do with my last 30 minutes of Saturday? I delivered on a promise and returned to my position as Head Legomaster, creating many wonderful and terrible constructions before retiring for the night. Also, I ate.

Day 2: Sunday, June 27th 12:01 AM. Over the hump, and down the hill.

Watch for Day 2 of my expertly-journaled account of the 48-hour technology blackout tomorrow.